As a little girl, my mother was concerned over any adult around me. She would have to meet the parents of my friends and really get to know them before I was allowed to spend the night. If one of my friends’ mothers started to date a new guy, my mom would have to meet …
Category Archives: NTOZAKE: love & dating
When a woman gets ‘friend-zoned’
Men seem to always talk about their fear of being pushed into the “friend zone,” a category where a man is not considered as a romantic option for the woman with whom he has an interest. It’s not as if the man automatically enters this “zone;” it could develop over time. However, a man tends …
‘Black Panther’: Killmonger is the everyday African-American misogynist in denial
After seeing Black Panther on opening night, I knew that there would be endless articles of people’s reviews on the highly-anticipated film: Theories of the symbolic meanings; ideas on what the film did for black identity; black progressiveness; successful black films; black superheroes; black characters outside of the negative images of pimps and prostitutes and …
Yes, I’m a black woman, but stop asking if I cook
Just because I’m a woman doesn’t mean that I’m supposed to adhere to your standards. Just because I’m a black woman doesn’t mean that I’m supposed to adhere to your standards and make a swine-filled meal of pigs’ feet and ham hocks like we’re still on a southern plantation. (If you don’t know what these …
Girls are ‘the devil’: Mommas’ boys
We treat our sons like princes. But sometimes, they have the tendency to be the men of the house. From the time they come out of the womb. OK, maybe not that soon, but not much longer afterwards. Pretty much when we realize that their fathers are dead-beats or just not the right type of …
#herSTORY: the femme noire 